awful, sweet. [braey]

[benjaminlocke]

It wasn't a great day out, to be honest. The snow had melted a little, turning the sidewalks into perpetual oceans of whitish-gray sludge that had sunk into his Converse and thoroughly drenched his socks. He winced a little as he walked, each step against the mostly damp sidewalk of the park sending a faint squeaking sound into the moist air. The green was coming back, visible, faintly, but the little green buds that were starting to dot the trees in the park. It wasn't sunny, and it wasn't raining or snowing, so that was good. The temperature was warm enough to melt the snow and not quite cold enough to require a really heavy coat - but a hoodie still seemed appropriate. It was cloudy enough with that faint threat of precipitation, so there wasn't a large crowd at the murky, grayscale park. Benjamin frowned, his brows heavy over his green eyes, mere flecks against his pale face like those buds on the colorless limbs of the trees. His shoulders slumped a little from their mostly resolute position, and he crumbled just slightly.

Well, he hadn't expected this at all. He probably should have, to be honest. With that X fellow and his blog, it was only inevitable that this would leak out, right? And, when the school board found out, that he'd be fired, right? Of course. That was how things worked, even if they really didn't have any proof of anything other than some - more than likely - teenager's blog and wild assumptions. His face screwed up, his lips twisting thoughtfully to the side of his face momentarily as he wondered who must have ratted them out. After all, he knew he hadn't told anyone, and knew Charlie hadn't, either. Well, besides Draven and Braeydon, and a few choice others. He was sure that they had better things to do than to gossip with some highschool blog though, right? Well, Braeydon had been attacked by the thing, too, so that wasn't a likely option, was it? Ben frowned yet, his eyes squinting against the sheet of gray that confronted his vision. The park was dismal in the winter, especially when there weren't kids running around or couples walking hand in hand. He was by himself, as far as he knew. Maybe, somewhere on the trails, there was a biker or a jogger or something - but he couldn't see them, so they might as well not exist.

He'd called Braeydon beforehand, because he knew their parents had screwed something up. Bad. He didn't know what though, but he knew Braeydon was upset about something, although the specifics weren't clear. That warranted some time out of Ben's schedule, because his little brother's sanity was a little more important than finding a job. Besides, he needed out of that apartment. He had a little money saved up to get him by until he could find a job, and he very much doubted that going and spending the day at some crappy park with his little brother wasn't going to severely damage his chances of getting a job. Well, Ben had already screwed that up for himself pretty well on his own. Still, the newspaper he'd been going through was in his pocket, and he was only mildly considering college. Again. He winced as he made his way over to one of the lonely looking benches, which was mostly dry and appropriate to sit at. College was not something he wanted to do again, but it seemed unlikely he'd get a teaching gig anywhere now. He frowned at the Beatles song that blared through his earbuds and sighed as he seated himself along the bench of the picnic table.

---
words! blah
outfit! tada
tagged! braeydon
notes! its... rusty, at best, but I'm working on it

[/blockquote][/justify]

[zv]

Braeydon Allen

[/font]
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
^{NOW I THINK I UNDERSTAND}
how this world can overcome a man[/center]

Soft, rosy lips were pursed together, fingers drumming against the fabric of his jeans before he paused, staring at his phone as he debated with himself. Ben wanted to talk to him at the park, but for some reason, the junior was thinking to himself that his brother was on their parents' side on what happened. He could be. It's not like Braey talked to him all the time, and he was sure they mentioned something to the older Allen about the recent few weeks. After all, they'd thrown Ben's name into that letter before shoving it in Braey's face. Poor kid.

With a resigned sort of sigh, the eighteen year old stuffed his phone in his pocket, pulling on his shoes, The Misfits logo emblazoned on both of them, before he grabbed his hoodie and pulled that on as well. Carefully, he tied a bandanna around his neck, to hide the bruises from the world before his fingers played with the ring on his thumb. It wasn't anything like an engagement ring. It was just a small ring that was given to him on Valentine's Day by one of the only people he loved with all his heart, and it reminded him that nothing would be wrong. That Dylan wouldn't leave him behind after school was over.

The sigh washed out of his lips and he stepped out of the dorm, shutting the door behind him, still fiddling with the ring as he stepped outside in the slight chill. 'Why does it still have to be chilly? It's March...' Braey frowned, even more so when a gust of wind blew in and nipped at his nose. The purple haired teen wrinkled his nose in reaction before shoving his hands into his pockets and walking towards the park, where he was going to meet his older brother to talk. He still didn't know what his brother wanted to talk about, and he was on tenterhooks about it. Wary and unsure as could be.

As Braeydon rounded the corner and walked through the gated archway to the park, his hands pulled out of his pocket and tugged the hood of his jacket over his head, green eyes scouting the area before landing on the familiar form of his brother. Time to face the music and just see what he wanted. Braeydon squared his shoulders and headed towards the bench, coming to a halt only when he was a few feet from his elder brother. 'iPod...' Braeydon sighed inwardly, but really didn't linger on the thought. After all, he was in front of his brother, and it wasn't like he was hard to see. One hand casually drifted out of his pocket and gave a half-hearted wave to Ben before dropping, his eyes flickering away for the moment. He just wanted it over with.

muse; eh.
lyrics; fiction - avenged sevenfold
listening to; pandora radio
tagged; ben
outfit; click.
notes; it's shit. sorry.
credits; template to moi. so no stealing!

[benjaminlocke]

His fingernails found their way to the chipping paint on the park bench, which was an older kind, the one made out of wood and painted over in the worst shade of brown, instead of the plastic ones. The paint was almost rubbery in texture as he peeled it idly away, chipping at it with his short, clean nails. He'd taken the polish off of them - maybe permanently, until he found a job - and that was that. Underneath the paint there was a rotted, soft kind of wood that smelled a little earthy, especially in the crisp, after-rain air. Even though it had rained a while ago, there were still puddles everywhere, and the air was still charged and sharp like it usually was just before or after it rained. He leaned forward on the table, propping himself up on his elbow and resting his jaw over the upturned palms of his hands.

There were trees in front of him, gray and misty and slightly green in tint, but not completely. It was so faint, that emerald color, that he could convince himself that he was probably imagining it. Within those trees there was a winding path, one that he could see for a short distance between the thick, colorless trunks of the trees before it wound so far back that he lost sight of it. Maybe the park wasn't the best place to come? It was kind of drab in the current weather, like the gray clouds were sucking the color out of the world, and had no desire except to leave it monotone and boring. Ben's eyebrows furrowed, possibly because he might have been giving the weather too much thought. Damn, he needed to find a job and get out of the house, and stop thinking. Or at least, stop thinking like that.

His eyes had closed for a moment, and he just listened to the sound of John Lennon's voice, and when he opened his eyes, his brother was there. He startled a little, although not to the point where he physically jumped or anything. Instead, he jerked the earbuds a little hastily out of his ears, unaware of how long Braeydon had been standing there waiting for his brother to notice him. "Hey, Braeydon." He said a little tenderly, like he was tiptoeing around eggshells. He knew something had gone on with Braey, although what exactly, he had no idea. He'd been completely unaware of the letter that their parents had sent him, or that he'd even been mentioned within it. His green eyes watched his younger brother's, his brow molded into a faint expression of worry, although he tried to hide it beneath something else. It ended up being a mess though, so eventually he just leaned back and rested his hands on the cracked, painted surface of the table. "You might as well sit down, I guess, unless you wanna go somewhere else. It's kinda crappy weather, I had hoped it'd get better. But it didn't, ha." It was a little awkward, his sentence, but nothing outside of Ben's typical awkwardness. "I'd have had you over at my apartment but it's, uh... Kinda messy. Actually, it looks like a tornado hit it." Braeydon probably would not have minded, but it bothered Ben to have people over in clutter. It was bad enough that Charlie would probably flip a lid once she found the numerous, baby-mountains of Chinese food cartons heaped about various corners of the house, because that was all he really could afford to eat at the moment. Well, at least he was losing weight, right? Although it wasn't really like he needed to in the first place.

"So..." Ben took a breath, paused for a moment, unsure as to whether to continue on. "So, how are you doing?" He wasn't sure what was going on entirely still, so he wasn't sure how Braeydon was feeling, either. His lips pursed as he watched his brother's face, that worry that had shone through his poorly constructed facade just as evident in those green eyes.

---
words! alalala
tagged! braey
notes! awww, he's worried for his babyyy brotherrr

[/blockquote][/justify]

[zv]

Braeydon Allen

[/font]
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
^{NOW I THINK I UNDERSTAND}
how this world can overcome a man[/center]

'Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.' The panicked voice rang in Braeydon's head and he closed his eyes briefly, desperately wishing that he'd texted and said he wasn't feeling good or something, instead of just showing up. What if Ben was just going to scold him, treat him like their parents did? Ben would never do that, but in Braey's confused and panicked mind, his brother was quite capable of doing anything right now. His weight shifted from foot to foot, and just as he was seriously considering turning around and walking away without his brother's notice, Ben opened his eyes and yanked out his headphones. 'Great. I could have acted sooner. But nooo..I get cold feet.' The childish voice in his mind scolded him, and Braey ducked his head just a couple of inches, his eyes dropping to the ground. "Hey, Braeydon." The tone of voice made the younger sibling frown, and his eyes shifted upwards towards his brother, jade eyes watching for a moment before flickering away. It was like he was being spoken to at his deathbed. Or it at least felt like it. "Hi Ben." His own tone of voice, however, was monotonous, or even melancholy, the way it came out. It was hard to contain all the emotions at once for him sometimes, and he was usually so bright and happy. He wasn't used to having such deep depression.

Braeydon's eyes flickered up, warily watching his brother's face, and his lips pursed a little, somewhat like his brother would do, before they fell into a line once more and his eyes shifted away from the mingling mess of emotions on Ben's face. What, was he feeling bad now? The scoff that threatened to come out of his lips was firmly held in place and Braey shook his head, keeping the noise from leaving his throat with great difficulty. "You might as well sit down, I guess, unless you wanna go somewhere else. It's kinda crappy weather, I had hoped it'd get better. But it didn't, ha." The weather. Of course. But, that was Ben. He'd always been awkward, and this situation didn't help that awkwardness. "I just want to get this over with." Braey hadn't meant for the sentence to come out so...roughly, and he frowned, ducking his head a little. What if his brother had no idea what was going on? And here he was, acting like an asshole to someone that he needed support from. "I'd have had you over at my apartment but it's, uh... Kinda messy. Actually, it looks like a tornado hit it." Braey shrugged a little, shifting his eyes. "Since when have I cared about how messy a place is?" he asked a little softly, his eyes darting back down to his feet.

It took a moment or so, but Braey FINALLY moved and took a seat on the bench near his brother, keeping his eyes down towards his lap and feet, unwilling to look at his older sibling. "So..." The beginning of an awkward conversation. Braey frowned gently at the thought, and sighed out. He should just get it over with, and he was hoping that it would end soon. Braey normally wasn't awkward, ever, but this was showing a whole new side of him that was far too like his older brother. "So, how are you doing?" Incredulously, Braey snorted and looked over at Ben, pursing his lips for a moment. "Mom and dad send me a letter about how I'm not their son - legal documents included - and call me all sorts of filth and other things, and you ask me how I'm doing." His voice, which started out rough, started to crack and break, and his eyes shone with the tears that were so close to the surface nowadays. "How do you think I'm doing?" This time, his voice did break, his shoulders hunching and his eyes spilling tears. "Just because I love Dylan. Because I'm happy. Because of the gender I prefer," he whispered, trembling a little. He hated it. Hated it so much. What had he done to anyone? To them? Well..they had always not much liked him, but that seemed to tip their tolerance level over.

muse; eh.
lyrics; fiction - avenged sevenfold
listening to; pandora radio
tagged; ben
outfit; click.
notes; ben's all worried and braey is just like >_> NYEH.
credits; template to moi. so no stealing!