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Post by afa on Apr 14, 2010 19:10:56 GMT -5
[/color][/b]" he protested bluntly, pretending to be offended. Once he'd gotten over that initial idea, though, he smiled. " Yeah, you'd come get me," he agreed happily, " because secretly, you love the toaster." As soon as the words left Tim's mouth, he realized the hidden meaning they held. Hopefully Carter wouldn't look too much into them. Oh, if only it were as simple as whether not his friend secretly loved the toaster, Tim thought wistfully. He laughed when the other man spoke again, imagining a fairly similar scene in his mind. " Oh, sure, a lot of thanks that would be," he rolled his eyes, " I save the toaster from your abuse, and it returns the favour by electrocuting me." It would make for a good comic strip, though. Tim snorted, easily recalling that particular memory. That was one of the many things he liked about Carter - the fact that he didn't strive to fit the mold. Those posters had been brilliant, in his opinion. Despite their making his friend look a bit daft, people had noticed them, and fans had been gained. " Yeah. Really, though, who needs perfection? It's not like your flyers didn't work. So what if most of the people there only wanted to see the weirdo who can't spell his own name?" Tim grinned, his eyes crinkling at the corners. They really had had some good times back in New York. Then again, they'd had good times here. Slowly, he felt his homesickness ebbing away. Jacksonville really wasn't all bad, and he'd be able to go home for summer soon enough. Why not enjoy the freedom while it lasted? Tim rolled his eyes at Carter pulled his pants up. Really, the man was all over the place - no keys, no shirt.. probably no cares, either. Carter probably didn't spend half the time talking to himself like Tim did; he just went for the things he wanted. Consequences were a mere formalty which one needn't consider until they had actually come into effect. Tim couldn't imagine being so free. For himself, he had to plan out every detail, consider all the possibilities, and decide whether or not something was worth it. And then, by the time he'd done all this, he was too mentally exhausted to even consider going through with the plan in the first place. Of course, there he'd been again, just going off on a personal rant while Carter went ahead with their plans of sandwich-making. Or not... as suprised as Tim was by the kiss, he still returned it. It was an automatic reflex, really. It wasn't his fault it felt so good. Tim barely had time to get his bearings before Carter's lips were on his own again. As usual, his will bent, and he couldn't push the man away no matter how much he wanted to. As Carter's hand moved to his neck, Tim brought his own hands to rest lightly on the other's waist, moving forward slightly from the wall until their bodies were pressed together. As Carter's kisses became deeper, more dangerous, he tightened his grip, blindly feeding the man's hunger. Tim used all the doubts and misgivings in his mind as fuel, pouring undisguised passion into a moment he knew would be fleeting. His heart beat wildly in his chest, and he felt both hot and cold at the same time. He was also quite sure that he'd forgotten how to breath, but that hardly mattered. There would be time for that later. When Carter pulled away again, Tim experienced an onset of panic. It was happening again, of course, just like all the other times - he was going to be left here once again, in this extreme state of confusion, caring so deeply for a person who would never return his feelings. He was practically a willing toy for his friend. Just a naive plaything who would be disposed of the minute something shinier and newer came along. Vaguely, Tim knew that he should give his friend more credit than that, but he wasn't in a particularily forgiving mood. Then, the other man's words broke through his thought, and he swiftly brought himself back into the present. Amazingly, he cracked a rather convincing smile, saying, " Oh, no. I'm terribly uncomfortable," he laughed, portraying a non-existant confidence. Hell, he didn't care when Carter stopped things. He was going to get as much out of this as possible. He pulled at his shirt, grimacing. " This is gross. I don't want it any more," he complained. [/size][/ul]
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Post by carter dominic andrews on Apr 15, 2010 0:13:53 GMT -5
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---------------------------------------------------------- [/size][/color] Carter had been listening rather contently when his friend was going on about the toaster, but of course he did pick up on that play on words. If only Timothy had known how much he truly had loved the toaster, this whole thing sounded like some damn chapter of a sick sadistic book and yet Carter did nothing to try to change that. He went through the motions sometimes getting lucky by mustering up enough courage to put his feelings out in the open through actions, when he'd throw himself at his friend he had wished the other would pick up on his advances, but it didn't help when his drunk ass would throw itself at other random people he'd barely known just so he could have a good time. He was a whore no matter which way he wanted to think about it, but knew that he could be willing to go monogamous for this one man. "Maybe that's because it secretly loves my abuse,"[/color] He smirked playing into the whole thing he'd just said while skipping to the next comment too. In a way he'd seen Tim as one that had liked the 'abuse', or at least he thought he had to or else he should have ran away long before now right? He had to clear his mind and getting home would do just that, or again it was what he thought would happen though had no idea when the door would be opened how much things would change. He listened to the talk about the posters and perfection and just laughed, "I thought you were supposed to make me feel better not worse?" He had felt so stupid that day for not realizing how to spell his name. It's not even like it was that hard either, both could pretty much be sounded out. He then took this time to slowly sound out both his first and last name in his mind trying to see how on earth he could have fucked them up. His lips were moving some so the other could obviously tell what he'd been doing, but he did stay silent because he'd been focusing so much on the task. There were no silent letters or anything really that should have messed him up so he just could not understand. He had to blame that one on him being drunk since it seemed like the only option. Either that or he should just stop fooling himself and agree with the world that he is a stupid fuck who seriously needs to start learning at least some sort of skill or trade for when he graduated. Carter could think about what he wanted to do after school but he knew it would never happen. The sad thing was he didn't even set high expectations of himself either. He would watch an episode of two and a half men and look at himself as Charlie, a whore whose a drunk jingle writer. That is what he would probably amount to in life, a drunk pathetic excuse for a musician. Either that or he'd be the typical musician and overdose before he was even thirty. He did not want to think of that considering he'd hoped he'd spent many years with Tim, but moreso he had hoped the two could do it as a couple instead of just friends. This had been the perfect chance as when his lips pressed against the others he did not feel him pull away, but instead he could feel the man stepping into him showing that he wanted it to go further. He could feel the amount of angst and passion flowing between their lips and he knew this was the exact perfect time to tell him just how he had felt. His lips broke apart from the others as he rested his forehead against Tim's ready to say something, well after he'd stopped panting because even his breathing seemed to be labored as he'd almost forgotten how it was done, so at least Tim hadn't been the only one on that aspect. Carter had to say something though. He had to tell him exactly how he felt and he needed to do it now. He opened his mouth and was about to speak when his mind drew a complete blank. It was obvious his brain was telling him to hold off telling his friend, and since his body could not stay away from Tim's for too long he needed to just forget about his worries. Hearing him complain about the shirt after tugging on it some had made things perfect as Carter stepped in to help as his fingertips brushed across the mans stomach as he lifted his shirt up. Before pulling it up and over his head though Carter leaned in real quick for another kiss, just one that would tide him over while they were hidden from each others views for those few seconds, and with that he broke the kiss and helped pull the shirt up over the mans shoulders and pulled it right off of him. "There how's that?"[/color] He asked with a smirk stepping back just a bit to admire his friends body. He stepped closer again and his hand came up to rest on his side as his fingertips danced across his stomach and up to his chest, Carter chewing on his bottom lip trying to keep himself from getting too excited, but right now he just wanted to savor the mans body because he honestly had no idea when he would get it again. Are you ticklish?"[/color] He asked as he could see a slight flinch or twitch in his side as his hands went grazing across it. He had found the trait rather cute actually and would find his hand traveling there most everytime just to watch it. He stepped closer yet to him though closing the gap as his hands slipped around his midsection resting on his lower back. He took a deep breathe as he leaned in for another kiss, this time in no rush as his lips barely swept across the others.[/size]
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Post by afa on Apr 15, 2010 1:20:04 GMT -5
[/color][/b]" he pointed out, proud of himself for coming up with that. " Looks like you'll never know the truth. But maybe you should keep the toaster around - I think it's good for a few more years, yet, and it doesn't really burn the bread that often." He frowned slightly, not sure how much that made sense in the context of their conversation. Then again - did anything make sense when the two of them went on like this? Tim gave his friend an incredulous look, holding his hands up defensively. " Hey, I thought it was brilliant. I would've thought you'd done it on purpose, if you hadn't told me otherwise." He looked away for a moment, thinking. Then, he turned back, about to say something when he noticed Carter's lips moving. He squinted his eyes in order to understand what the other man was doing, and grinned in realization, shaking his head. Yes, it was quite shocking that Carter would've managed to spell his own name wrong. " Ah, well. You can play wicked guitar, so who really cares whether or not you can spell properly? You'll just have to get rich, and pay other people to do it for you. Problem solved." Tim smiled, hoping his words would make his friend feel less like an idiot. He felt a bit bad about putting him down earlier. As Carter pulled away for a moment, Tim took the opportunity to catch his breath. There was something almost tangible in the air between them; he could practically feel the unspoken level of closeness they shared. Tim found himself experiencing a shocking moment of clarity. He raised his eyes to meet Carter's, searching almost desperately for the secret he hoped might be within. There was something, for sure; a sort of hesitation. A misgiving. But, almost as soon as he'd glimpsed it, the extra emotion was gone, replaced by the regular passion. Tim lowered his eyes almost shamefully, as if he'd been caught doing something wrong. Mostly, though, the feeling was directed at himself. Why couldn't he just tell Carter how he felt? Why did he need proof of the other's love? Why couldn't he just come clean, right here? What was he afraid of? Their friendship was already messed up as it was, by this stupid secret. Despite this, though, Tim just was not ready. He was on the brink, really. Standing on the very edge, looking down into a dark, unknown abyss, wondering if the leap would be worth it. Tim felt a thrill of pleasure as Carter's fingertips brushed his stomach. He grinned crookedly as the other man drew his shirt up, accepting the quick kiss before the fabric rose over his head. He lifted his arms slightly, allowing the garment to slide off his skin and fall without care to the floor. He raised an eyebrow as Carter stepped back, both thrilled and embarassed by the fact that the other was obviously observing his body. " Better," he decided simply, returning the smirk. Again, as Carter's hands contacted his skin, Tim had to suppress a shiver. He bit his lip against a giggle as the other man hit a slightly ticklish spot, raising his arms to wrap around Carter's neck. " Maybe," he breathed. Again, Carter's hand found the ticklish spot, and Tim let out a soft snort, automatically flinching away from the irritation. Just as quickly, though, he moved back, eager to return to their previous activity. As their lips made contact yet again, Tim had keep himself from illiciting a moan of pleasure. No way would let let the other know just how much he was enjoying this. As Carter's hands made their way to the small of his back, Tim found himself being pulled closer until there was no space whatsoever left between the two. The moment Carter's lips brushed away from his own, Timothy found them again, capturing a kiss that was only slightly more involved. He didn't mind taking it slow - hell, he'd loved Carter for years already. Besides, the slower they went now, the more time he'd have to simply enjoy the closeness; once they got to a certain point, his friend would be sure to push him away. But this was just innocent; a simple kiss. To Carter, it probably didn't mean anything, but to Tim, it was like a sort of rare gift. [/size][/ul]
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Post by carter dominic andrews on Apr 16, 2010 21:36:19 GMT -5
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---------------------------------------------------------- [/size][/color] Carter had to laugh when he started to give him reasons why he should keep the toaster around, "You think?"[/color] He asked with a genuine smile as he glanced over at his friend without speaking, "The toasters pretty reliable, I don't think I could bring myself to get rid of it. Not now, not a week from now, not ever."[/color] He loved how both of them were using the toaster as a way to get around talking about their feelings for one another. Since Timothy had continued the conversation Carter had figured he'd just meant the actual toaster, maybe he had been saying all of this just to keep up with the jokes, but as far as he'd been concerned he was serious as could be. Of course he did keep a grin on his face just in case if Timothy had gotten serious himself, and then Carter could have something to fall back on. It was true though, tonight had been ackward as far as conversations had went. He just grinned even wider laughing for a few seconds glancing at Timothy with a somewhat comical look, "Spell my name wrong on purpose?" He thought about it for a second and it'd almost made sense, but in the end he had to blame the misspelling on his own stupidity. "You really think i'm that good?"[/color] He asked having loved getting complimented on his music infront of Timothy. It would make his day usually and tonight had been no exception as he'd heard that. His body started to feel warm as he tried to calm himself as those butterflies seemed to flutter in his stomach. He could not let his friend see this side of him though, the one so damn in love it wasn't funny, so instead of saying anything else he just laughed about the rich comment and shrugged some. "Why hire someone when i've got you?"[/color] He thought about what he had just said and had a feeling that might have came off a little bad. "Not that i'd give you some shit job like that given the chance. You wouldn't have to work, you'd be my arm candy."[/color] He remembered something about a sugar daddy but could not remember the rest of it. Carter knew that if Timothy looked into his eyes long enough all of his secrets would be revealed, but as soon as their eyes locked he just could not bring himself to look away when he knew he should have. Something glimmered in his best friends eyes though, something that seemed so much more intense right now, but he had put that just because the two had been getting fairly intimate so maybe it'd been nothing more than lust. He had always hoped it could be more though but couldn't hold his breathe. He had to do something but couldn't think of what needed to be done, so instead of all the thoughts that were in his mind he went and kissed him again pressing their lips together not wanting to pull back this time. He had to take a breathe soon as he found himself almost drowning in his own flooded emotions, so he went and pulled back once more gasping some for air as he'd almost forgotten to breathe while so close to Tim. The man had that affect on him. He was very thankful that the man had been so willing to take his shirt off, and of course he was overly excited when the man had kissed him back before he'd pulled his shirt over his head. He had the stupidest grin on his face as he stepped back to admire the man. Carter bit heis own lip when he could feel Tim's arms wrap around his neck as the two had been close once more. "I think you are,"[/color] He whispered about his friend being ticklish as he could hear his snorts and couldn't help but laugh himself. Everything about Tim had just been so cute. As their two bodies drew closer to one another he could feel his breathing already starting to get more labored as his lips met an easily anticipating Timothy. He craved to be with the man but didn't know how he could do it without messing up their friendship, so if all it came down to were simple kisses and touches Carter would be all for it. He had to keep himself calm enough that he wouldn't get too arroused, that would kill the mood and he'd probably have to answer a good amount of questinos, but then again he could just randomly say that he'd been making out and was just horny. He had hoped it'd be a good enough answer but knew his friend would be able to see right through the lies.[/size]
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Post by afa on Apr 17, 2010 11:13:53 GMT -5
[/color][/b]" Timothy grinned happily. Doubtful as it was, he chose to believe that Carter was talking about Tim himself, rather than their toaster. Besides, why would anyone keep a toaster around forever? Especially their not-quite-brand-new model which was fairly temperamental. With a sigh, Tim reflected that there really was nothing quite like a good, reliable toaster; one you didn't have to stand around and supervise to see if today was a 'burn' day or an 'eat your damn bread raw' day. Of course, this was slightly off-topic, and he decided that their toaster was good enough for him before continuing with the conversation. Tim shrugged, looking over at his friend. " Well, you know, you might've done it to get people's attention and stuff. That's what it did, after all." That was just like Tim - to see the good in everything. It was true, though - how many people were out there, trying to get noticed? And how often did spelling their names correctly help? Exactly. " No, I only said that to inflate your already over-sized ego," Tim rolled his eyes, then smiled. He'd always loved watching Carter play. When his friend was in the zone, doing what he loved, he just seemed so happy. Content with life. And that, in turn, made Tim happy. It was win-win, really. " But seriously, you are that good," he added, in case his sarcasm hadn't been clear earlier. He laughed at Carter's comment, shaking his head. " Believe me, I'll be with you.. every step of the waay..." spontaneously, Tim's sentence morphed into a rusty version of Whitney Houston's 'I Will Always Love You,' and he soon dissolved into laughter at his own embarassement. Even when their gaze had been broken, Tim still felt the effect of it draping over him. Almost greedily, he returned Carter's frantic kiss, sliding his arms more tightly around the other man's waist. There was a sort of rushing in his ears. He couldn't think; he was running purely on instinct, though somewhere in his mind he was aware of every single thing that was happening. All he knew for sure was that he wanted more, and that realization alone drove him on until he, like his friend, was forced to pull away in the interest of oxygen. He heard Carter gasping, and looked up, a coyly amused expression on his face. He was quite sure that he looked just as much like a panting dog as the other man. The thought emitted a breif, breathless laugh from Tim, though he was more focused on continuing their ...'activity.' Although Tim knew Carter couldn't see it, he grinned at his words. As much as he tried to hide it, he was quite obviously comfortable in the other's arms; he just felt so right here. Confident, too. Even their friendship couldn't compare to this feeling - and that was saying a lot. As Carter laughed, Tim shook his head slightly, muttering, " shh, don't tell." Then, he kissed him again, gently. He knew that the other would put an end to things before too long. He could already feel the man's unwillingness to go further. But, until that moment, Tim wasn't planning on backing down; he wanted this too much. [/size][/ul]
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Post by carter dominic andrews on Apr 17, 2010 15:20:15 GMT -5
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---------------------------------------------------------- [/size][/color] "Do you ever find fault in me?"[/color] he asked though of course loved the fact that his friend would try to justify anything that Carter did just to make him look better. He personally had known that he was nothing more than some lame fuck up who'd probably get nowhere in life, but at least he had hope when Tim was by his side making him sound so much better than he'd actually been. "I knew there was a reason I kept you around,"[/color] He loved the optimism outlouk that his friend had and wished that some of it could rub off on him sometime, but sadly he was doomed to be the pessimist of the two. That was just another reason the pair worked so well together, their thoughts balanced each others out no matter how odd that had sounded. And there it went again when Timothy threw the next compliment his way as he had been throughout the entire night, but this one had Carter cracking up just by the way he'd heard it come out. "How would you know that i'm that good?"[/color] He asked placing that sexual innuendo in there as he wiggled his eyebrow some playfully. He loved bringing up random things that he knew would make Tim's heart skip a beat and his thoughts race, and he had a feeling that saying something along those line would do just that for him. Of course he did not want anything to serious to come out of his random pickings, so at least he was thankful that Tim didn't have asthma and go into attacks each time the two talked like this. If that were the case Carter would surely be the death of him and he could only imagine having that on his shoulders for the rest of his life. What the hell? Why was Carter thinking about his friend having an asthma attack and dying? He needed to slow things down for the night, his thoughts were getting away from him and he was afraid given the chance he would come right out and say something, and he knew that would NOT be good at a time like this. That comment sent his mind for another spin as he said he'd be there every step of the way, and overcome with emotion he figured instead of saying something he'd rush at the others lips and bury his thoughts within his head. Timothy's lips had just that effect on Carter too as the moment they touched everything else seemed to disappear, and sometimes he just wished he could tell his friend so he knew just how much he'd craved the other. "I'll keep it our little secret,"[/color] He whispered with a grin against the others lips this time taking it slow as he'd left soft pecks before stepping back away from the other and out of his arms. "We should move this into the bedroom, i'm getting cold."[/color] He pouted some though it had been an obvious lie. Even if he'd had his shirt off there had been no draft and the school still had the heat on, so how on earth could he be so chilly? If anything he'd wanted to put his hand to his forehead to check for a fever he'd felt so hot. He took the others hand not wanting to be even an inch away from him as he pulled him close leading him to their bedroom area. He looked at his bed that had still been messed up since this morning, or sort of afternoon, when he'd finally woken up and rolled out of it. He kicked his shoes off and threw them out towards the common area where they had just been, he'd pick them up and put them back where they belonged later, but for right now it'd been all about his friend and him. With each second longer he stayed in this he did not want to get out of it. He would try to think of reasons to justify if it were to go all the way but he just couldn't. His friend would probably hate him and that'd of course make him hate himself. "I know we're skipping ahead over food but I think you could forgive me right?"[/color] He asked walking around Tim so his friends back was to his bed. His hands found their way to his stomach as he sat him down on the bed leaning over him so his lips could press against his friends again, that satisfaction swarming over his body once more as he could feel an almost high like state come over him. This was perfect and right where he wanted to be right now.[/size]
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Post by afa on Apr 17, 2010 21:26:59 GMT -5
[/color][/b]" he told him, then laughed. Optimistic as Tim was, he knew that no one could be truly perfect. However Carter, despite all his self-deprication, was damn near close. Of course, Tim probably wasn't the best person to go to about this sort of thing; he was hopelessly biased about the qualities of his best friend. He laughed once more at his friend's next words, feeling strangely childish. This was just the sort of pointless banter that got him up in the morning. Tim groaned when Carter next spoke. " I walked right into that one, eh?" he giggled, blushing yet again. As usual, Carter had managed to find something sexual in even the most mundane of sentences - something Timothy had never excelled at. Not that it was a particularily good thing to excel at. Funny, yes, but highly inappropriate, which was why he left that side of things to the other man. He grew silent after a moment, staring out across the dark landscape. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, he turned back to Carter, saying " I like April." He'd had to keep the conversation going somehow, after all. He didn't like their strange, static silences very much. Too many unspoken words hung in the air. Tim was still laughing when Carter's lips met his, and this realization didn't help matters. Driven to giddiness by wild emotion, hidden desire, and the late hour, Tim giggled helplessly against the other man's mouth, pulling away just a bit too soon. Then, he let out a final chuckle, smiling happily. Hell, he didn't care if Carter knew just how much he was enjoying this. He had a right, after all, didn't he? Slowly, he raised his eyes to the other's, lifting an eyebrow. " Definitely," he nodded, to the comment about it being their secret. Easily, he returned the kisses, reluctant to be away from Carter for too long just yet. The absence of his warmth was like a physical shock, and Timothy had no idea how he'd be able to go back to acting like he didn't care after all this. Of course, he felt like that every time. He'd manage it somehow. He shrugged nonchalantly at his friend's suggestion, not wanting to reveal the effect of the other man's words. " Fine by me," he agreed, unable to keep a small smile from crossing his lips. Smoothly, he intertwined his fingers with Carter's. Already he knew that, soon enough, the man would put an abrupt halt to the whole thing, and as much as it pained him he couldn't resist the pull of desire. Tim followed almost suspiciously into the bedroom, preparing himself for the oncoming heartbreak. He should say something, he knew; three little words could change his life forever. Either way, the outcome would have to be better than this constant limbo between insane happiness and rejection depression. But how would he ever be able to find the right time? Would his emotions just explode one day, forcing him to come clean, or would he simply spend the rest of his life sitting on this terrible secret? Slowly, Timothy slipped off his shoes, brushing them to the side with his foot. He rolled his eyes at Carter's blatant lack of cleanliness, though it really only made him love him more. " Well... it'll be hard. But I can try," Timothy told him sarcastically. How a simple sandwich would ever be able to overshadow what they had now, he didn't know. As it was, though, he'd probably end up eating one alone later. After Carter had gotten tired of him. He sighed silently, wondering why he constantly let the same thing happen over and over again. Fortunately, Carter chose that moment to remind him, and Tim moved easily onto the mattress, tilting his head back for the next kiss. [/size][/ul]
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Post by carter dominic andrews on Apr 17, 2010 22:28:15 GMT -5
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---------------------------------------------------------- [/size][/color] He knew that kissing him like that had been a mistake when he pushed him against the door. He knew that making the remark about his shirt and taking it off had been a mistake. He'd even known that walking him to his bed had been the biggest mistake of all. This happened on an almost regular basis as he had found himself in that exact position so many times before, him hunched over his best friend with their lips pressed together, and he knew right now that he would have to end things before they got too serious. How much more could he take since his friend had been half naked sitting in his bed just about waiting to be taken advantage of? He just could not stop himself as each time he pulled away his lips would just crash that much harder against Tim's, and his entire body seemed to scream for the other to just take it over. "You have no idea what you do to me,"[/color] He managed to mutter, his voice low and gruff as you could tell he had been turned on by the other. He was good at hiding it though as the hunched position was making his pants a lot baggier than usual giving him at least some extra room to work with. He had to think of a good excuse, something that he could use to get out of this without hurting his friend, but at this hour at night what could he honestly say? He just had to do it and hope to go it didn't make things weird. He pulled away standing up and pacing the room once or twice, just long enough to take some deep breathes and calm himself down, and then he stopped walking as he'd reached right infront of Tim. He had to say something to him to let him know that this was not alright, not like this, and that he had to stop pushing him forward when he knew how it was going to end, but instead right when he had opened his mouth to speak he found his thoughts being wiped clean once more as he once again brought his lips against the others. His hand cupped behind the back of his neck as he pulled him in deeper with the kiss, his tongue easily finding it's way to Timothy's as he let out the faintest of moans. He'd been enjoying this too much as he pulled away once more and stood up taking another deep breathe. Oh what the hell did this man do to him? He had no problem with other random people so why the hell couldn't he just do what Tim had obviously wanted of him, or at least Carter had hoped he'd wanted it. He found himself again ready to say something to him about how he should not be doing this, but once again his lips did nothing more than fall and meet Tim's as he sat there. He must have looked so foolish leaning down and then standing up back and forth like he had been doing, but this time he took it one step further as he pressed his upperbody against the others using his hands to guide his shoulders down against the bed. He kept telling himself he had to stop this and to just give it up, but at the same time he was fighting an even stronger urge to push forward because Tim hadn't been fighting it. He figured things should be alright if Tim wasn't putting up a fight or anything right? He shrugged to himself trying not to think so much but having little luck doing so. "I'm sorry,"[/color] He whispered against his friends lips as he'd had him laid down on the bed as he'd been damn near right on top of him. He pushed himself off the bed and ran his hand through his hair. "I'm sorry, just sorry."[/color] He started to ramble taking a step back leaning against the wall looking away from Timothy as he had to calm himself down because he'd been getting way too arroused by this. His wrist went up to his lips as he'd applied pressure with his teeth, again this being just like at the park, and when he'd let a silent whimper escape he'd stood straight up and headed towards the door. "I am all sweaty anyway, you wouldn't want to lay with a man that smells." Carter had not been that bad of course but it had been the only excuse that he could think of at the moment. "I'm just going to go take a shower and i'll be back in a little while or something."[/color] He shrugged as he walked out and picked his shoes up to place them together right near the door. "It shouldn't take me too long. I'll understand if you fall asleep though,"[/color] He could not stay in that room to see the look on his friends face as he had just pulled away. He knew it would be too much and he'd want to go further if Timothy had looked hurt in anyway, so instead of sticking around he did what he did best every other time and got out of there with an excuse. Luckily the bathroom was right close by in the suite and after grabbing a towel and his shower caddy he made his way in there. He had no intentions to need to shower tonight but figured he might as well so the excuse could hold up. Knowing him his friend could be pissed enough to play CSI and smell his skin for the scent of the soap or something. The thought had him laughing some as he finished getting undressed and turned the water on. He felt miserable and was unsure of what was going to happen when he got out of the shower, but one things for certain he did not want to stick around to see just what sort of emotion that Tim went through. It'd break his heart, Tim was his only weakness and to see him hurting would be hard, but not nearly as hard as it would be when he was the one causing the pain.[/size]
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Post by afa on Apr 18, 2010 1:07:59 GMT -5
[/color][/b]" he said somewhat harshly, almost begging the other man to stop. What, he didn't know. Maybe stop having this effect on him. Maybe stop taking advantage of Tim's useless feelings. He remained motionless as Carter stood, his eyes following his friend around the room, waiting for the inevitable. His fingers gripped the bed even tighter, needing something solid - something to count on. Tim's head was spinning without direction, flinging itself wildly into the darkness. The suddenness of Carter's kiss brought him slamming back to his senses, and without thinking, Tim responded violently, pouring the last of his passion into that single gesture. I have no idea what I do to you ? Is that it? he thought angrily. For a moment, he fed off the injustice of it all. The only person Carter thought of was himself. It was never about Tim. If he was such a good 'friend,' why hadn't he stopped doing this the first time he saw the hurt in Tim's eyes? Why did he keep going, keep dragging him into this same situation? Why was it so difficult for Carter to see that there was more to the whole thing than his own damn feelings? As they kissed again, Tim quit holding back. Hell, he had two minutes left, if that. He wasn't going to waste it by being all sickly sweet and easy. He let Carter push him into the bed. In fact, he fell back faster than the other had intended, carelessly inviting him to either go ahead with things or get off already. He felt the other man's breath on his lips as he spoke those terrible, terrible words, and sneered, sitting up roughly. Then, through the relative darkness of the room, he gave him a seething look. " You're always fucking sorry," he pointed out. Tim didn't normally act like this, but tonight, he'd had about enough of the whole thing. He was emotionally exhausted. Quite frankly, he didn't want to have to deal with the constant unpredictability of their friendship any more. He wanted to get rid of the giant elephant in the room, to lay it all out on the table. Unfortunately, at the moment, he was too upset to do anything more than convey his distaste. As Carter offered his stream of excuses, Timothy remained silent, staring stonily at nothing. He didn't even react as his friend left the room. He simply listened for the sound of the door and, once he was absolutely certain that the other man was well and truly out of earshot, he leapt from the bed. Blind anger gave way to complete desolation, and he stepped into the living room area, struggling not to cry. He wasn't a five-year-old, for fuck's sake. Why did he have to be so weak? Hastily, he found his shirt on the floor, and pulled it over his head. Then, he did the same with his sweater, grabbing his keys from the counter and opening the door. Before stepping out into the hall, he glanced back, gazing at the kitchen. " You can keep the fucking toaster," he muttered to the empty room. For some reason, that seemed to ease his mood, though he still exited their dorm. Somehow, Tim managed to keep himself composed until he got outside, where the pain finally consumed him. Feeling much like a lost child, he crumpled to the ground, folding his knees toward his chest and wrapping his arms around his legs. Then, he buried his head in the small area of created darkness, allowing his emotions to finally reign free. [/size][/ul]
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